Information regarding how great performers deal w/ post performance depression. Especially the feeling of loss

I know this feeling well, and I feel for you. It's so tough when you're working, working, working, you finally get the desired effect and applause, and BAM–it's over. Anyone would be depressed about that…even a businessman working on a big deal, soccer player in a championship game, anything.

What I'd say is to find another something to work on. Pick out a song you've been wanting to learn for awhile, and not necessarily a huge long concerto that is recital material. Find a stupid love or rock song that you love and play it while you sing (even if you can't) or something simple and beautiful that you've heard that just brings out emotion when you play. You obviously love what you do at a high level, now's the time to sit back and instead of working with it, live with it and reap it for all it's enjoyment. It may help you realize that it's not all about the big performance experience, it's also about the little personal experiences, too…and those you can ALWAYS have, even sitting in your living room with your baby grand. Having your soul into the music for a year doesn't have to end today.

Keep your mind busy, but don't avoid the disappointment and loss that you feel. Make sure you get out, make sure you still play, and keep people in your life. At night, when you feel sad about it, cry (or whatever it is you want to do). No shame, no nothing. Think of the future and what you'd like your next recital to be like or where you'd like to be in a year with your music. Set new goals, envision greatness while you're laying in bed (my favorite), and find something new to work for after you're done grieving.

Good luck in the future. Wish I could hear you play
References :

I recently went through the same feelings after a co-chairing a large charity event. I found some success creating a new project for myself, something new to plan for a family member. It's a smaller event, obviously, but it has really cheered me up.

Perhaps you can create an event for yourself. Have you thought about creating a list of songs to perform at a local school or nursing home? It won't be the same as the recital, but it will involve planning, practicing and performing. I wish you luck, and keep making music for others to enjoy…
References :

i sleep for a long weekend, then go find the next few challenges,….gotta be like a shark-keep moving forward!
References :

Organist here… Recently played a big Halloween concert- Toccata and Fugue in Dm- and now I'm feeling blue, not the funky jazzy blue, the brownish blue.

I'm coping by talking to some friends, and posting quite a long story here, and maybe I'll try to find some St. John's wort… Think I got a few other old prescrips laying around somewhere… I dunno, maybe this brief period of 'i don't give a fk' is a good thing.

But right now, it's all quite anhedonia. Oh to inspire the mignons! I want to feel that drive, that rush of the larger than expected crowd, the expectation of glory or utter defeat, the be-all end-all, the your either gonna beef-it or your gonna soar like an eagle… And especially with memorized organ performances, it's an all or nothing principle. The possibility of miraculously turning into a pretzel right in the middle of one of those finger puzzles- on stage in front of everyone is a very real potential!!! It's not like you can blame the drummer. It's just you…

That part in the Toccata where you gliss up A C# E G Bb was the only part where my fingers, out of the blue, played a trick on me. Figures that it would be something easy. But in general, I spanked it. The majority of my mental/physical tension was relieved by the time I got into the fugue. The fugue was as perfect as I could have hoped. No problems of noteworthy importance.

But now here I sit, feeling
not as a pile of sh-ite
but rather as a cat who
has killed the catch
grown tired of playing with it
and is now pondering an unnecessary nap.

I even got laid! You'd think I, the Phantom of Opera, would be marveling at my own greatness, but no… I have utterly no self-serving/loving narcissism with which to hold my head up. I just stare off into space like a completely spent moron. Durrrrr, wha'da I do now??? It's like I'm in a performance coma that was partially induced by sexual drama combined with a few dashes of really good wine. And let's not forget the performance enhancing anti-anxiety pill that helped me stay nice and lucid for the peformance. Probably screwed with my chemical balance a little there, but it was worth it for that extra bit of control in the face of danger.

Where's my spark? I'm supposed to be virile, you know, able to go and go and go, but right now I'm no no no. Hey, at least I can type this long drawn out massage to appease my disparaging soul's discontent. I'm not even looking forward to the potential of more 'relations.'

I keep trying to force myself to smile, saying, "oh but I'm going to do so much more than this!" And there is- much more to do, but for some reason… I feel fake. Like I just came but really just peed a bit… It's all good, but it's not all good.

I guess there's a time to be the Great, and there's a time to be the sloth. To all things there is season. And my season right now, is pathetic season. I'll get great again, sometime. But as for now, I'm a moose.

You guy's heard it's some accident happened in Mike Tyson family pure guy, his so great and popular , even he do a lot of crazy things he didn't deserve it . I'm a big fan of his – we should pray for him.

@connollycmc:
Hi. That is very encouraging to hear.
I just finished putting a show together with two of my most admired artist friends, a flamenco dancer and a singer-guitarist from Argentina. We held it at local theater, about four hundred people came, I had members of my family band get up and play.
A few months ago we were asked to do this show, so we've been getting ready for it for a while.
I've been wanting to do a show like this for years- I would say it was one of my most deeply held dreams. I've done many hundreds of shows, all types of music, but flamenco has been my special passion. It has taken me about twelve years to get even the basic forms established, and believe me, I'm still struggling to maintain what I've acquired so far.
Anyway, the sense of risk in getting on stage with two artists who have been doing this art form since childhood and early teens was quite high. I also had to do a lot of the work involved in getting promo together, act as a liason for six or seven people, organize travel arrangements, rehearsals and help organize the music for the show itself, send out tapes, etc. All while I was sick with bronchitis.
I had to do the show sick, and also act as MC, make the speeches about the artists, be funny, and perform the music with these IDOLS of mine. LOTS of stress.
We pulled it off, full house, two standing ovations. Great, I thought. It was a dream come true, now I can just rest and enjoy the triumph.
But I woke up the next day feeling like someone had died, and the sense of gut-wrenching grief hasn't lifted in over a week.
My friend said that when you have all the adrenalin you need to do a show like that, there is a crash, a withdrawl, after it's over.
I've experienced this to a smaller degree after other big shows, but I think since this was so important to me, there was an element of having a dream die that I had to contend with- even though I know it was not my whole dream, and that soon I will start dreaming and acting towards the next part of the bigger DREAM ,of which this was only a scene. I also think it has to do with having an illness that makes it hard for me to trust that my coordination will be there when I need it, so there is an element of that to the sadness I feel.
Yeah, I was really suprised that there has been no rush of victory at all. Just a huge vacuum and also deep fear that because of my health, I won't be able to follow up on this success. Doing the show was brutal, but the aftermath seems almost worse! How strange…